I am feeling overwhelmed after yesterday. There were many reasons to smile and strengthen my hope in humanity and there many reasons to feel perplexed and helpless.
Two people I am acquainted with visited me. While I had lunch with one, I enjoyed chamomile tea for the first time with the other. I felt the concern in our security uncle's voice when he told me to ensure that my visitors wash their hands as soon as they enter my house. "We have got them to wash and sanitize their hands at the gate too". I spoke to two mothers about homeschooling and unschooling and assured them that there is support available in case they decide to take this path. I asked my house help to take the week off and not worry about her salary. What perplexed me and made me feel helpless was the whatsapp discussion happening on a group I am part of. I got into sharing my take when I saw a poll on whether to give house help paid or unpaid leave and count went to 10 for unpaid and 0 for paid leave. I couldn't help intervening and talking from the position of our caretakers - our house help. At one point a member also threatened to get the house helpers arrested under section 144 in case they organize a morcha. Many others joined me in trying to get these women to empathize and be sensitive to the issues of house-helpers.
After a lot of comments which went to and fro - a couple of ladies brought out the real issue. One said, "We are working from home. It's practically impossible to invest energy at work full day and then do all the household work in the evening". Another noted, "I am feeling stressed out right now.Working from home with a 2 year old kid and above dish washing, cleaning, clothes washing and cooking etc."
The real issue is not about giving house helpers leave from work - whether paid or unpaid. The real issue is that these women are working their asses off and their only support system are their helpers. This got me wondering - are these women truly empowered? Has financial / economic independence empowered them?
This is a time for the entire family to pitch in and support each other. Everyone can share household chores. Menfolk I hope you are reading this. Menfolk you too have two hands and two legs and a brain. Start taking responsibility in washing, cleaning and cooking. This is a time when you need to pitch in. Discover the joys of housework.
This is a time to support our elderly neighbours and the ones with little children. It is a time to actually help by sharing food, running errands, catering to the needs of our vulnerable neighbours. Like another member on the group said, "Let all members chip in and help neighbours in need - in whatever way one can. I am doing grocery shopping for an elderly neighbour whose family is not here.
Amidst all this intense discussions, I received a message from another acquaintance who had been silently following the entire drama on whatsapp. She shared, "Thank you for sharing this....changed my perspective at looking at things...I was giving full payment but reluctantly...But now with no second thoughts."
"We have a small scale industry with 70 workers and we don't know yet how to handle the wages situation. But we're going to think about the workers first." and these lines restored my belief and my hope in humanity.
Originally posted on Facebook on March 20, 2020
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